What it means to be a man

In reading Paul Theroux's essay on being a man, I came away with a much different perspective than I had before. The author explains in quite some detail how much he hated being a man. In reading his thoughts, I gathered that it was tough for him having so much more intelligence and imagination than his other male counterparts. His experiences caused him to dislike what he was because he did not want to conform to what is thought to be the norm. When we think of what being a man consists of, we automatically begin to think of the gladiator and caveman mentality. We are supposed to be tough, ready for a fight at any time. We are also supposed to be hunters and go out and find our food and provide for the village. Only certain professions are "manly", like a mechanic, construction worker, or even a newspaper journalist. Even many today's young men take on a "tough guy" mentality whether it is starting fights for miniscule reasons or carrying around a gun with intentions to use it at the first sign of trouble. I agree with the author in the sense that we as men are expected to conform to a prearranged type of behavior. In reality, men have a responsibility that can directly affect the country and the entire world around them. We need to work on shedding our tough guy image and start behaving in ways that make us real men.

We've all heard the expression "behind every good man is a good woman." This is true more times than not. I know that I certainly would not be the person that I am if my wife didn't support me 100% in everything I do. I feel that she is supportive of me because I respect her and treat her like the intelligent woman that she is. What is wrong with a lot of today's men is that they were not taught to respect women when they were growing up. They could have grown up in an abusive home where the father beat the mother, or where their mother was totally submissive to their father. Either way, these so called men are the ones who disrespect our women and treat them like dirt. They use them as sexual objects or meal tickets. Without women, this country would not be what it is today. We owe our women a whole lot more than just our irresistible personalities. Our mothers sacrificed a lot to raise us to contribute to our society. We owe to them to treat the rest of our women with the respect that they deserve.

One of the most beneficial aspects of my life was that I grew up with both of my parents in the home. Unfortunately today, about 30% of our households have children without a father in the home. In my opinion, a major part of being a man is being fathers to our children. The numbers on fatherless homes today are staggering. Children without a father in the home are more likely to commit murder, spend time in jail, have behavioral problems, and run away from home than children with both parents in the home. Being a father can directly affect the future of our society since today's youth are tomorrow's leaders. Any idiot can make a baby, but it takes a real man to be father.

Being a man involves much more than what kind of job we have or what kind of car we drive. We have a responsibility to our community to be fathers to our future men and to give respect to the women that that we owe our existence to. Then and only then can we begin to call ourselves "real men."